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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29127927">Ladybugs</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/prince_pqul/pseuds/prince_pqul'>prince_pqul</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bugs, Greenhouse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Ladybugs, M/M, Self-Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts, sad but very sweet, this took me forever but hey i think its sweet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:13:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,902</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29127927</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/prince_pqul/pseuds/prince_pqul</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>While checking up on bugs, Gonta feels a bit down. Korekiyo really does try to comfort him, but he's as troubled as his boyfriend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gokuhara Gonta/Shinguji Korekiyo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>71</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Ladybugs</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hello!! been a bit, but i am still thinking about these two. fun fact, this was supposed to be a birthday fic, but it got derailed, and i figured i'd keep it like that. i hope you guys enjoy!!</p><p>tw // suicidal thoughts, implied child abuse, mentions of sister, scars reference, self-hatred</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>With a click, the greenhouse door closed behind the both of them.</p><p>	Korekiyo gently wiped off snow from his jacket and picked snowflakes from his hair. With the energy similar to that of a canine, Gonta shook his jacket of snow quickly, flicking snow from his shoulders and hair. Korekiyo blinked away some snowflakes as they hit his eyelashes. Despite the mess he just made, Gonta immediately tidied it up, sweeping the snow away from unwanted corners with feet or swipes of his hands. Gonta even helped Korekiyo with gently brushing off snow from his shoulders and hair with now un-mittened hands. The sentiment gave a small burn to his already red ears and nose.</p><p>	Gonta, after getting most of the snow, looked to Korekiyo, “Is Kiyo OK now?”</p><p>	Korekiyo smiled under his mask, still wiping away snowflakes, “Yes, I am OK. You are kind to help me.”</p><p>	A smile grew on Gonta’s face, “Well, that’s what gentleman do! Help Kiyo get clean and free of snow!”</p><p>	Korekiyo glanced to Gonta’s hair, motioning with his eyes, “Are you to clean your <i>own</i> hair?”</p><p>	Pause prefaced a pat and a look to his hair. Gonta’s eyes widened with an ‘oh’ escaping his lips. He tried to wring snow from his hair, but Korekiyo put a small hand to his work, airly laughing under his breath, “Oh Gonta, I jest. After all, we are here for another important task, yes?”</p><p>	The bug enthusiast nodded, “Yes! Gonta remember! Gonta must look good for bugs, though.”</p><p>	A laugh escaped Korekiyo’s mouth. Gonta continued to wipe himself clean of snow. Once he was done, Gonta slipped his coat off, retaining his scarf, and offered to take Korekiyo’s. With a smile and a nod, Gonta neatly hooked Korekiyo’s coat off, putting both on a nearby coat rack. </p><p>	As soon as he was done, Gonta spun and ran over to a corner, avoiding the racks and tables of greenery. Korekiyo soon followed, putting his gloves and hat on the coat rack, and walking up to Gonta. Gonta’s extreme enthusiasm for his interests never ceased to amaze Korekiyo. Of course, he was not void of his own excitement of topics, as he would consistently ramble on about fables or gaze for too long at treasured relics. He supposed the more outward expression of his excitement was what made Gonta himself. Regardless, Korekiyo found himself watching Gonta kneel down to small pots. </p><p>	The entomologist gently brought his fingers to small ladybugs, watching as they slowly crawled into his hands. A smile was crawling into Gonta’s expression, slowly getting happier the more he looked at his bugs. The two of them were lucky the school had offered a greenhouse program. It almost wasn’t going to stay, as funding for the gardening club was plummeting. But, thanks to people like Gonta, it was retained. And, Gonta had turned it into an insect haven. During cold weather, like their current January, Gonta would bring a collection of bugs inside, raising them patiently and keeping them warm. Gonta was kind. He was a dedicated, strong man who was smart in what he was doing. To continue his work through thick and thin was dedication, even when nature itself fought back against him.</p><p>	Korekiyo stepped next to Gonta, looking down at his kneeling figure. Korekiyo looked at Gonta’s fingers, now carrying a handful of ladybugs, “Are they well, Gonta?”</p><p>	Gonta nodded, keeping his attention to the bugs. After a couple of moments, it was apparent Gonta was only going to study his bugs until further notice. Korekiyo found it quaint. Gonta was always so engrossed in his work, Korekiyo felt almost rude to intrude. But, Korekiyo could always observe. He neatly descended and kneeled next to Gonta, bringing his attention to the small anthropods.</p><p>	Gonta noticed Korekiyo and smiled, “Kiyo, do you want to hold ladybugs?”</p><p>	Korekiyo smiled, looking to Gonta’s eyes, and nodded, “Whatever you would like.”</p><p>	Gonta shook his head, “Kiyo don’t need to hold ladybugs if Kiyo don’t want to.”</p><p>	Korekiyo grinned to Gonta’s concern, “Gonta, it is OK. I can hold some.”</p><p>	A moment was held in their eye contact, Gonta possibly trying to read Korekiyo, but then Gonta held his bug dotted finger to his guest’s hands.</p><p>	To be honest with himself, Korekiyo was still not fully comfortable with the small creatures. The thoughts of unwanted guests and spiders gave him shivers that he did not want to admit, and they could be quite the shock to touch. But, Gonta had taught him so much more than he could ever imagine. Now, instead of disgust, intrigue overpowered his worries. There was still a chill when a spider travels up his arm, but he enjoys its company more than before. Gonta had truly shown him a world he had never experienced before.</p><p>	Korekiyo watched as three small ladybugs wandered onto his bandaged palm. He had always forgotten how small ladybugs were; he could have carried those three ladybugs on merely the tip of his finger. He found himself leaning in, trying to see the three bugs’ details. They reminded him of small ruby shards or possibly small beads of a necklace. But, without mistake, one of the easiest recognizable marks on a ladybug was the black dots. Each bug had a different pattern as well as the frequency of spots. A small rumor surfaced in Korekiyo’s head.</p><p>	“Gonta…” Korekiyo gently started, “I have heard that for each dot on a ladybug, that is the number of years the bug has lived for. Is that true?”</p><p>	Gonta looked to Korekiyo, looking a little confused, “Huh? Ladybug… age on back?”</p><p>	Korekiyo sighed quietly, nodding, “Aah… That possibly proves it.”</p><p>	The bug enthusiast looked back to his own handful of bugs, “Gonta don’t know where that come from, but ladybug don’t live for many years. Most, ladybug lives for 2 years.”</p><p>	Korekiyo nodded, “Aah. I see… <i>Now</i> that rumor does not sound correct at all. I wonder where that surfaced…”</p><p>	Korekiyo found himself brainstorming, searching his years and years of knowledge for something to grab onto. Silence, ironically, was what brought him from his quiet thinking. Gonta should have been huffing or talking, petting his bugs, or even fetching for more. But, he stared at his palm. His smile was fading.</p><p>	The anthropologist leaned forward, “Gonta?”</p><p>	Gonta looked up to Korekiyo, his smile faded, “Oh, sorry, Gonta just thinking about ladybug. …Ladybug don’t live long. Gonta going to see ladybug die.”</p><p>	Korekiyo frowned, tilting his head to look at the small bugs Gonta held. For someone who studied bugs most of his life, Gonta was aware of the short life spans bugs possess. Korekiyo supposed that today, Gonta was feeling melancholic about their shorter lives. It stung him to know someone so happy to feel sad, especially at something so trivial. Korekiyo softly said, “I know it is sad, but it is nature. Every bug is to live and die at some point, similar to us.”</p><p>	Those words stirred in Korekiyo’s head as he kept watching Gonta. He didn’t perk up or give a smile. Korekiyo felt the words he had just said burn on his tongue. Poor choice of words. Comforting words were never his forté.</p><p>	Gonta looked Korekiyo in the eyes, “Kiyo… Will Kiyo die soon like ladybug?”</p><p>	Korekiyo blinked, slightly taken aback, “Huh…? What do you mean?”</p><p>	Gonta kept eye contact, “Well… Kiyo said Kiyo and Gonta die like bugs. …Gonta won’t die soon… But… What if Kiyo dies soon?”</p><p>	Korekiyo bit his tongue. That certainly wasn’t what he meant. But… Gonta did bring up a particular predicament.</p><p>	He looked down at his handful of bugs. Korekiyo did not want to die. Certainly, Korekiyo did not want to die soon. To die was to leave the world’s loved ones behind. For Korekiyo… There were both loved ones on land and in the sky. For as long as Korekiyo was to live, he certainly wanted to spend it all with Gonta. He had never met someone more kind or patient before, and Korekiyo wanted nothing more but to see his life through with him. Merely thinking of living in an apartment together made Korekiyo smile with childlike giddiness. But… Korekiyo cannot be untruthful. Korekiyo misses Sister. He misses Sister with every fiber in his heart. Sometimes Korekiyo trails his fingernails down the scars on his hands, remembering fights or fits She would have. Even though the scars bring depressive memories, he can’t help but remember how much he dedicated himself to Her. Sister, despite every mishap, was still important to him. And Korekiyo had pondered what the feeling of meeting Her again would be like. Sometimes he wished he could meet Her immediately with a swift move. Oh, Korekiyo should not try and lie to himself. Korekiyo’s always thought of leaving early. Reunion with Sister before his time on land was over was a common thought. He wished it wasn’t true, but even Gonta can’t stop his desires somedays.</p><p>	Ladybugs crawled on his hand. Ladybugs possibly did not have such thoughts. Ladybugs did lose their mothers but they didn’t wish to join them early. To be a ladybug was to live without worry. Korekiyo watched the small bugs crawl to the fingertips of his hand. He figured his cold hands were bothering the bugs.</p><p>	Korekiyo held his hand to the flower pot, letting the bugs crawl back home. He inhaled slowly through his nose, “Gonta… We all must die at some point. It is more of a matter of when.”</p><p>	Staring at his handful of bugs, Gonta sniffed, “Gonta hopes Korekiyo doesn’t die soon.”</p><p>	Before he could process the phrase, Korekiyo noticed that tears were building in Gonta’s eyes. Guilt wrenched at Korekiyo’s gut. Goodness… he didn’t mean to make Gonta cry, especially over something so simple like morality for himself. He should apologize.</p><p>	Korekiyo hovered a hand closer to Gonta, “Gonta, I’m sorry. I did not mean to make you upset.”</p><p>	Gonta shook his head, blinking away tears, “Kiyo OK. Gonta just sad about things.”</p><p>	Shame grated at Korekiyo. He should have noticed that Gonta was upset much earlier that day. Why must he bring up such sad topics when he wasn’t well? The anthropologist was never good at comforting words. Korekiyo used a spare hand to grip into a fist to disperse his irritation in himself.</p><p>	Gonta continued to sniffle when Korekiyo looked to Gonta’s palm. Despite the collection of bugs he had, there were two ladybugs in particular he noticed. The outer shell of their body, usually a smooth shell, was cracked and was open at a poor angle. Spots were irregular and lines carved into the delicate shells. Wings were chipped and even stuck outside and trying to flutter to no avail.</p><p>	Korekiyo gently asked, “Are… Are the bugs doing well?”</p><p>	Gonta gave another sniff, tears now traveling down his cheeks, “Y-Yes. Bugs well.”</p><p>	Yet, Gonta kept his eyes on the small creatures. Solemn silence hung in the room, the buzz of other bugs humming behind them. Korekiyo rarely saw Gonta cry. If Gonta were to cry, he would keep it to himself in privacy, or he was upset to a great degree. Korekiyo felt his heart sink. Korekiyo was at fault to make Gonta that upset. A simple check-up for Gonta had now become something Korekiyo had ruined. For someone who made him so happy, Korekiyo was angry at himself for not returning the sentiment.</p><p>	Gonta hiccuped, “W-Well, Gonta still glad bug alive.”</p><p>	Korekiyo brought his attention back to Gonta, a little surprised. Gonta started to carefully put the ladybugs back, “Bugs been through lots of bad. G-Gonta glad bugs are OK now.”</p><p>	Now, tears had welled in Korekiyo’s eyes.</p><p>	In the face of such sorrow, Gonta still found a light to look to.</p><p>	Once the bugs were safely on the plants, Gonta wiped tears from under his glasses and any snot on loose sleeves. He mumbled, “S-Sorry for crying. Gonta just s-sad.”</p><p>	Korekiyo shook his head, putting a hand on Gonta’s thigh, “Gonta, it’s OK. It is OK to be sad.”</p><p>	Gonta sniffled, nodded, “O-OK…”</p><p>	Korekiyo discreetly wiped any of his building tears, gaze returning to the flower pots, “If anything, I should apologize to <i>you</i>, Gonta.”</p><p>	The entomologist turned to Korekiyo, “Hm?”</p><p>	He rubbed Gonta’s thigh gently, an attempt to comfort, “As articulate as I seem, I falter with comforting words. I have seemed to make your mood worse today.”</p><p>	Pause scared Korekiyo. Gonta, after some wait, quietly said, “Kiyo did not make G-Gonta sad.”</p><p>	Korekiyo sighed silently, “You do not have to lie.”</p><p>	“Gonta not lying. Kiyo is OK.”</p><p>	Korekiyo looked to Gonta’s eyes, still red. Gonta hiccuped an inhale, “Gonta sad about bugs, that’s all. Kiyo helps Gonta think about things. Plus… Gonta thinks crying is good way to feel better. So Kiyo is OK.”</p><p>	His words sat with Korekiyo. Gonta always saw the world positively. Maybe too positively. Korekiyo was always a twisted man. If he were to disregard his poor words of attempted comfort, he has always had trouble with himself. To his discretion, Sister was a major part of making him that way, but he couldn’t blame her for everything. Korekiyo had dreams of murder and fantasies of gore, thoughts that no human should possess. No wonder Korekiyo thought of joining Sister. Gonta was too kind to him.</p><p>	Silence had soon filled up empty time between the two of them. Neither one of them followed up their conversation. Both of their eyes trailed back to the pot, watching the ladybugs crawl around on blades of grass and the petals of flowers. Some ladybugs hopped into flight, fluttering to nearby flowers or other sides of the greenhouse. But, the damaged ladybugs simply lugged through the grass, traveling up flowers slowly to nibble on pollen. They were lucky to be alive. In such a state, the icy world would have certainly eaten them alive. In the small area of the greenhouse, they could live to the extent of their lives. With that, a small thought piqued Korekiyo.</p><p>	The anthropologist said, “Gonta… you saved these bug’s lives.”</p><p>	After rubbing his eye, Gonta looked to Korekiyo, “H-Hm?”</p><p>	“If it weren’t for you… those bugs would have surely died outside, regardless of the weather.”</p><p>	Gonta blinked, following Korekiyo’s eyesight to the slow ladybugs. He processed Korekiyo’s words slowly, then mumbled, “Huh… Kiyo right. Ladybug would of d-died if not for Gonta.”</p><p>	Korekiyo watched the small bugs, wandering without worry. A damaged ladybug, now perched in the pollinated center, flicked its wings. Scars on the shell were obvious, glinting against the greenhouse lights. They were small gashes as if it had fought against a clawed beast. It nibbled at the pollen, sinking itself into the stamens.</p><p>	A lightbulb went off in his head. Korekiyo found his bandages itching. His eyes watered.</p><p>	Oh, of <i>course. Of course,</i> that’s why he was given love.</p><p>	He brought himself to look away and stared to the ground. Gonta, noticing him, cautiously asked, “Kiyo…? Is Kiyo OK?”</p><p>	Embarrassment was not his first emotion as he wiped his tears. Korekiyo nodded, “Y-Yes, my apologies. I am just thinking.”</p><p>	Gonta had scootched closer to Korekiyo, a hand hovering near the thin man for comfort. Korekiyo took his hand, holding it softly as he stared at Gonta’s fingers. Gonta had a firm but warm grip. Gonta turned towards him as Korekiyo continued.</p><p>	“Gonta… Have you ever considered the allegory to this greenhouse?”</p><p>	Gonta shook his head, “Allegory? No, Gonta d-doesn’t know.”</p><p>	Korekiyo breathed deep, a small smile surfacing, “Well, Gonta… perhaps these bugs are not the only thing you’re helped.”</p><p>	Korekiyo lifted his head to look at Gonta, making eye contact. Gonta processed his words, then his eyes widened, “K-Kiyo? Does Kiyo mean him?”</p><p>	A smile pushed against his mask, sniffing, “Yes… I mean myself…”</p><p>	Korekiyo gently squeezed Gonta’s hand, eyes trailing to his fingers, “I am j-just like one of your small bugs… I am not perfect y-yet, nor am I healed, but you’ve helped me while I am in a cold place.”</p><p>	He could hear Gonta sniffle, but Korekiyo found himself on a ramble, “To t-think you love me as m-much as one of your critters… I…” Korekiyo sniffed, pausing for a breath,  “Gonta… I am still cold… And it might b-be a while until I completely heal… B-But you’ve taken care of me. And… Because of you…” Korekiyo paused again for a deep, shaky breath, “I am going to live longer than I ever intended… w-with you.”</p><p>	Gonta’s hand shook in Korekiyo’s grip. Gonta’s other hand raised to cover his mouth, as he was now sobbing. Korekiyo found himself crying as well, silent tears trailing down his cheeks. His heart ached. Korekiyo, despite how much he wanted to see his Sister’s smile, he told the truth. He was going to try and live for as long as he could, as Gonta kept him close.</p><p>	Korekiyo reached his lanky arms around Gonta, softy pushing his body against his chest. A soft hug turned desperate quickly, as Korekiyo gripped the back of his shirt and hugged tightly. Only then did Korekiyo start to sob. Worries Korekiyo didn’t even know he had started to pour out, soaking Gonta’s shoulder. His hug was returned with an equally strong embrace. Gonta sobbed. Korekiyo shook.</p><p>	A ‘thank you’ was muttered from the anthropologist as ladybugs fluttered to flowers.</p>
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